August Disillusionment

"Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity." -Ecclesiastes 1:2

There is nothing permanent about the human existence. Everything comes to an end and somehow it never ends this vicious cycle. One thing leads to another and you come full circle. Are we fooling ourselves? The individual is so small, so insignificant. Everything one can ever do dissolves into nothingness. We earn and consume just so we can earn and consume. 

So many things out there to keep the heart busy. To make us feel like we are contributing. To make us feel like we are a part of a good cause. To make us try and give meaning to our little lives. But for how long? Everything ceases. Some take longer. There is nothing so noble about the human heart. And if there be it is short lived. Everything comes to an end. There is always something that will ensure that. Change is the only constant you probably think I am thinking. Well true. But is this change any better? It's just something to disturb the status-quo. And if it does seem to improve something about the human condition so what? It will eventually degrade. Human mind is too capable of that. Talk about systems? Well, they'll just take longer. Give it a few years, or decades or perhaps if they be resilient enough give it a century or so. Change is the only constant.

Definitions. There are too many of those. Aren't they only human constructs? I am tired of definitions. I want to do away with them, but at the same time I'm equally a component of definitions. I make them and I become a victim of them. So does everyone else. This only makes me wander if we are delusional and, again, if we are only fooling ourselves.

I don't know about you but I know that I am totally messed up inside. There are too many conflicts, too many contradictions within me. I say I believe in something but I live like I don't. I say I desire something but I am not able to give everything I can to make my desire a reality. It is no longer important enough. I become afraid, I am risk-averse so I play it safe. Play it mediocre, play it complacent. I just don't have it in me. I am shallow and myopic, I might not look so. I give in too easily to distractions, they lure me away. I am loyal to none but I am a slave. I am caught within the confines of  the narrow human mind.

(Picture Courtesy: Google Images)