The Narcissist

All my life I have associated objectification only to the sexual realm, and for obvious reasons. Having grown up in what they call the "rape capital" of India, it is not surprising that far too many times I have been made conscious of how strangers view my body as merely a means to whet their sexual appetite. Be it a random man trying to hump me in a crowded public bus, or someone by the road-side flashing his private parts at me, or another sexually frustrated man inviting me into his car like it was the most normal thing to do. But the part that makes least sense is how each of these men succeeded in making me feel filthy from inside. That is how you feel when you have been violated.

As sickening as all that is, it is not what I am here to voice. I have very recently acquired an intimate knowledge about another kind of objectification, a subtler one. And although it doesn't seem as grave as its sexual counterpart, it is objectification nonetheless and absolutely no one has any business subjecting anyone to it. Maybe it is a sheer inability to consider other people and their feelings, in other words unadulterated narcissism, that makes a person treat another person like something less than a human being. All this person thinks about is "my life and my issues," and therefore, no one else is visible. And even if others are visible, it is through the lens of "I, me, myself." This person holds an utterly distorted view of the world, and even has the audacity to refuse to see anything else. Hence, I am of the opinion that a narcissist is necessarily in adamant denial too. Otherwise, a narcissist would cease to be one and the world a happier place for it. If you have ever known a narcissist you will understand what I am talking about. Trying to be friends with such a person is a harrowing affair. Engaging in any form with this person constantly feels like being used, because at the end of the day, you are merely an object to them. An object fitted into their little world to ensure posterity for their little kingdom of self. And that is not okay. No one has the right to treat you any less than the complete person that you are. No one has the right to violate you.

This objectification of the lower order is what I mean to highlight, negligibly detected or admitted and yet you might just find yourself having to deal with one. Separate yourself from that narcissist ASAP. 


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